A modest proposal to the Democratic candidates

27 Nov

Lady and gentlemen, you all have me worried. You’re going to lose the election in 2008. You know why?

It’s simple. So simple, it will make grown men and women (and kids too) cry.

People in this country are tired of Bush and the Republicans. They hate the war in Iraq, they want the troops home for Christmas, they realize the economy is falling apart.

The easiest way to win in 2008 would be to go around pointing out how every single one of the Republican candidates, save Ron Paul, is trying to be more Bush-ish than Bush. Hammer that message home: bigger Guantanamo detention centers, more tax cuts for the wealthy, veto expansion of children’s health insurance. All the R front runners are simply Bush 2.0. They try to distance themselves from him, but when you look at what they stand for, it’s all W all over again.
But you turkeys aren’t pointing that out. You’re getting caught up in squabbles amongst yourselves. If you want to become the front runner in this nomination race, show us how you’re going to beat the Republican nominee. If you’re not interested in doing that, then drop out.

Start hitting the Republican candidates’ and their positions, tie them to George W. Bush and Dick Cheney, and then you’ll see your numbers go up. If there’s one thing all the Democratic voters want, it’s to beat the Republicans. If you can show us that you can do that, you’ll be decorating the Oval Office in a little over a year.

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